An Uncommon Love

I would like to introduce you to Braden Aaron Brown and Abigail Elizabeth Wadley. 

Braden + Abby

Two extraordinary people.  The type of people that would wince at my suggesting that word....(which already says loads about them)......The type of people that thrive in absolute zero attention space. The type of people that somehow manage to distance themselves from the accolades that seem to shower around them consistently.  What is most uncommon is that they both never let themselves truly "inhale" the compliments.......Rather, they say thank you.....smile--because they are smart enough to know that you, the giver, needs to feel good for giving the compliment, and then they "snap back to grid" to that place where superlatives do not exist.  In essence, they are quietly gracious.......Uncommon?   I would say yes.

They have known each other since they were in grade school.  They became friends in 7th grade.  Braden, painfully shy, someone who would do almost anything to keep any attention or notice directed his way, showed up in a way that caught this young girl's attention.   His gift was that he knew who he was at a very young age.  He found his footing early and has never veered since.  He was a young man that had decided early in life, that he was going to "go about and do good" (Acts 10:38) in every interaction, in every relationship, in every thought and deed.  It is no small thing to remember who this scripture referred to and the profound parallels it has to Braden.   While we witnessed Braden's behavior and interactions with our own eyes, we didn't have the advantage of seeing Abby growing up but, we have had strong inklings she followed a similar code of life by the way Braden felt drawn to her.  I wouldn't be surprised a bit if her parents saw similar motivations and patterns in their home.....

Uncommon?  I would have to say yes. 

Most young people struggle to navigate the awkwardness of early "teenageship",  Braden seamlessly glided through those messy crags and crevices with an amazing amount of ease and solidity. I am sure he might describe it differently, but it was clear to us that somehow his roots went deeper, and when the wind blew, he was steadfast.....never allowing the tempestuous winds of junior high temptations that blew his way to alter his focus, or his path.  It didn't matter what the world threw at him to try and knock him off his feet, it never worked.....I am sure it was frustrating to those that tried.  What was especially cool was that no one really wanted to.... He managed to be totally integrated with academics, sports, music, friends and yet was able to fly adeptly under the mainstream radar exquisitely with the sophistication of a trained fighter pilot. An unusual talent for high schooler..... Uncommon?  I would say yes.

 And there is this Abby person.... Wow!  You would love her!  You would probably only need about 5 minutes to find out too.  A smile that would melt an iceberg, a differentiated disposition honed her entire life to be loving, kind, and generous.... the kind of generosity that flows freely.  When she pays attention, she really does.....no fake smiles or laughs.  She is so smart, intellectual, precise in her calculations--whatever they may be (lots of spreadsheets!!) and perfectly balanced with her constant beautiful smile and wonderful sense of humor.  She has super high emotional intelligence -- she is able to adeptly walk into a situation, observe the room, the situation, the people, and react just right.  Mostly it works because she wears a  countenance that puts you at ease........ immediately.

Uncommon....To me, yes.

You see Abby, equally extraordinary, was observing from afar.... she wasn't looking for the typical Junior High School boys most girls would.... it wasn't the sports, the clothes, the neighborhood or the car (The car was cool however..!) .....No, she had a different gaze.... it was deeper and went under the surface of stuff.  It took more time, more consideration, more precision, but she saw something that was not obvious to almost everyone else.  She saw Braden's heart early on.  She watched him act quietly.  He didn't say much, but his actions, how he interacted with others, and how he carried himself was loud and clear.  She zero'd in on a different target.......and set things in motion that forever change both their trajectories....... and Braden didn't seem to complain too much! 

It happened quietly, without commotion, and very little noise......This thing....this uncommon love.  How two 7th graders could be so stealthy--so wise, so young?  I don't know.....Did they see this coming way back then?  The idea that maybe there was this very tiny seed of an idea... that germinated into a possibility of something more is irresistible.....and very cool.   I would like to believe that maybe these little post it notes of possibilities would come to them, maybe while eating lunch on the sidewalk at school each day, or thinking of each other during class......that this precious thing they were growing, could eventually lead to something as incredible as the eternal union they will be forming today.  

I love the way they found each other, grew together and found love.  While this may not sound that different than other love stories, The way they did it was uniquely theirs....special,  intimate, powerful and uncommon.  

What they will do next will be no less impressive.  They have framed a perfect  and precise blueprint of how they want to live their lives.  I think about the vise grips pliers I have in my toolbox.  The kind that once locked on--don't come off......That is what these two have done.  They have locked their "vise grips" tight around how they want to live leaving no question in anyone's mind about what will result.....They will go about doing good for the rest of their lives.

Talk about an intentional life! 

So, with the help of a little tune we like to sing at home, we send you off into your heart shaped sea.

"All I needed was the love you gave

All I needed for another day

And all I ever knew

Only you...."

The elusive scratch to a recurring itch

I have always been that person that looks longingly down every winding bending roads like this picture.... wondering what lies just beyond sight... my imagination holds my realistic earth brain hostage and forces me to fantasize about what Lord of the Rings-esque adventure is lurking, baiting me, yes....even beckoning me.

It is difficult to squelch the desire to turn down every interesting looking lane. I have found that this also occurs on the inside of me too.....Every so often, I find a certain restlessness inside.... It usually is unprovoked and sudden. The feeling is not anxiety, but rather feeling that something "pulls" me elsewhere. It is not always a place that I can articulate, but the "pull" is strong, pervasive and persistent. It starts with a notion, then progresses into a slow steay beat of a drum. The pace doesn't quicken, but it becomes constant. It isn't an "itch" that I can "scratch" locally.... meaning, It isn't physical, so I do other things to try and find that scratch....movies, shopping, reading, but to no avaial.

It usually remains until I actually physically leave where I am and travel to a place that gives me a new perspective and reminds me of who I am. I am often confused by the idea that that "leaving" often means "finding" myself. Regardless......until I do, the beat becomes a dull ache in my soul. Recently that ache came, but I really had no place, plans or way of leaving... but then a trip appeared-- Chicago for 4 days. Wow! Did that do the trick. I walked for hours downtown, strolled along the boardwalks parallel to the inlet waterways, took pictures of tall beautiful buildings, ate at open air cafe's and watched the teeming life of people passing by. There was a sense of business and everyone was going somewhere.

I can't seem to articulate why, but I found again the return of that comfortable feeling of remembering who I was seep into my soul.....it felt familiar as if I knew the place and it's people for a long time and the place knew and accepted me back..... It is silly to think I have to go somewhere else to remember who I am because I know who I am on paper.... I am my Mother's son, my wife's husband and my children's father......right? You would think that one would know these things without any shadow of a doubt. I know that I am a child of God that I have purpose and meaning in my web of relationships. This "itch" however... is something else. I used to think that I would grow out it of when I got "bigger". At times I thought the feeling was really just a manifestation of my own selfishness, which I still am not sure it isn't. I would like to think that it isn't, but maybe I am self-deceived in saying that.

All I really know is that I feel the "pull" and when I do finally leave and immerse myself somwhere else that a balm forms and erases the ache. I come back different, at least for a while, feeling alive again and refreshed. But above all else, I have a greater sense of being connected to everything and that helps remind me of who I am, which I find incredibly meaningful. Being able to feel deeply in this way is a relief and unburdens me in a inexplicable way. There are some itches that I hope never go away.......