#MYPACIFIC

Andre Gide said:  "Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore." 

This became the title for the recent documentary of 6 incredible women who made a seemingly impossible journey rowing across the Pacific Ocean from San Francisco to Australia.    It was crazy.... For about 9 months they took ritualistic, relentless 2 hour shifts between sleeping (hardly) and then rowing....every day, every night...yes!... the whole entire time.....simply crazy!    I am a sucker for human interest stories especially if they involve the kind of stretch that changes people forever.   I was hoping this would be such a story....I decided to watch it the other night not so much because I was interested in watching women rowing hour after hour, rather I was a lot more interested in what made these women tick.  

The actual documentary wasn't that dynamic in terms of production and sheer entertainment value.  Much like the journey itself, it was a bit long, boring and monotonous at times.  In fact, after the first 20 minutes I almost stopped watching.... but, because they were so committed, I felt like I needed to be as well...  I thought... "Would I be letting them down if I didn't watch it all the way to the end?"... Ha!  Silly, but true. These women I didn't know somehow guilted me into it and so I kept with it... I kept with them....Plus, I needed to find the "squishy emotional motivational center" of this whole deal and I hadn't figured it out yet.

Watching them forced me to put myself in their place, attempting to imagine their insane existence and yet time after time, when I would think that I would have just stopped.... they wouldn't.....they didn't.  No way.  As a result I felt myself being drawn into their emotion every so slowly, but it mounted.  There was this one point where I began to feel more connected to their cause when one of them mentioned this quote again....

"Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore."

The words carried deeper meaning and weight.... It was only then, that I started to reflect on my own life....I recalled some of the hardest things I had experienced in my life...  Memories came, feelings resurfaced, and I had to reconsider how I handled them in light of this quote... "Did I traverse my trials with this type of courage of willingly losing sight of the safety net to cross the chasm without knowing what was up ahead?"  "Did I dig down so deep as these women did?"  "Going past the point of exhaustion, finding that new place where there is nothing left to give?"  This definitely made me reflect and wonder.  How many times have I believed that I had left it all on the field, only to later realize I hadn't?  How many times have I convinced myself that I had nothing left in the tankto give or to try, only to find more drops to spare looking back at me...... 

It was interesting to watch these women pass through their crucible at the same time wondering and contrasting my own experience....  My respect for them grew considerably.  By the end, the story had won me over, it had managed to slither its tendrils down and wrap them tightly around my heart...My emotion spilled over and it felt awesome to somehow be part of their joy of accomplishment and super human achievement.  

They talked about what this journey would mean to them later.... All I knew is that they would never be the same, ever again... it reminded me that whenever we do things for the right and best reasons, we can be forever changed, if we have the right frame of mind and intent.... those ripples will never stop, forever increasing outward....

At the end, Natalia, who seemed to the leader of this group, summed up everything so beautifully by sharing this :

"Everyone has their Pacific to cross" 

That is what I needed to hear. That sealed the deal for me.   I needed to be reminded of my own Pacific crossings... this is why I needed to finish this particular story... I knew something was there, but I hadn't connected to it until the end.  These women weren't just breaking some record, or raising awareness for some noble cause, or trying to prove something for their ego.... at least not to me.  What they were doing was doing something remarkable to remind you and I and everyone else, that we are all rowing our own versions of the Pacific Ocean somewhere... and that our lives may not be always exciting, in fact, we more often experience long spells of routine and mundane repitiveness, and that we need to remember that we can win, that we will win, that we can overcome all adversity and not just endure, but be refined in the process..... to come out as something brighter, more durable, more resilient, more beautiful then what we started with..... Like these women did.  To acquire a deeper love for life and empathy for others.  It was really cool to cross the finish line with them.....

So.... I wonder.... 

Is it possible, that somewhere in the recesses of my earliest memories.... a memory before "here".... one so faint and fragile that I can barely pretend to remember I can believe I was with you and others on a distant shore... a shore far away, in a different time, a different plane, a different universe...before you and I knew we existed as we do now here, in this life?  

A place where we longed to cross an vast spiritual ocean.  An ocean of forgetfulness, that with each stroke of an oar, our memory of this place and shore would slowly fade...yes, as if like a veil one might say, might cover our mind and eyes to total forgetfulness.  But with with clear purpose, great hope and exceeding faith we would row, like these women did, to a beautiful destination, a place we had not been before.  A destination that would reunite us forever if crossed and rowed with enough faith and determination.  I would like to think that you and I both, held hands, leaned and looked forward and lept from that shore never looking back, knowing we would risk not coming back--completely losing sight and courageously willing to cross this unknown ocean together. The journey would seem so long and uncertain—so filled with risk. It wouldn’t be easy, but we knew it was worth every effort because deep inside, a whisper of a memory that reverberated in our hearts that we would be reunited again with others in a grand celebration of reunion.  If this crossing resembles even the smallest part of the crossing these women made, then... yes.  It would be worth every oar stroke.....

I wonder.... 

How am I doing?  Can I go the distance even when I can't see the shore ahead?  

All I really know is that I won't stop rowing.  I might stop and rest at times... but i am not going to quit.  How about you?  How is your Pacific crossing going?

Until then, keep rowing... and I will catch you on the flip side where all will be well again....