The Fab 4: Lessons of Experience

I was reflecting a few nights ago about milestones and began thinking about my kids.  The more I thought about what this past year has been like for them all I could think about were the multitude of  milestones they had achieved.   As I started to mentally list them, I wondered if they had the same awareness as I did about them.  I am sure there are others that I am not actually aware of.  Regardless, I as I thought more about each one, I realized how significant they were, at least in my own mind.  I have learned that there is great value in spending time intentionally thinking about and noting not only the achievements, but also the lessons learned from each. The ability to critically identify the specific things we have learned from our experiences and then apply them forward is what accelerates growth.  

I spend most of my time at work on this concept in an attempt to identify high potential leaders and then to properly match them with the right development experiences that might accelerate their growth.  Sometimes we get lucky and we find ourselves fortuitous enough to be placed in a "stretch assignment" that enable us to learn some new skill or behavior or to expand our capacity to move forward faster.  Other times we leave an incredible amount of learning on the table because we never ask ourselves if or what we have learned from our experiences.  We just simply pass through them like  proverbial 'checkbox' moments and chalk it up as just one more task completed.  

The past couple of years have been a banner years for all of my kids.  They have hit significant milestones.  They have pursued their interests and dreams with high energy and perseverance.  It is amazing to witness... I hope they pause at times and consider if they are learning the right lessons from their experiences...

Here are a few:

• 
  
  Landon - Completed his first year of medical school.  I now know a bit more why so many don't pursue that route.  Many probably have the intellectual horsepower, but fewer have the guts and grit to actually plow through the sheer weight of the load and pace of content, research, testing and writing.  I am not going to try and compare this with any other field as they are all rugged and rigorous journeys in and of themselves, but med school is intense.  Landon has gone through many hard things in his life, but this is one of those unique stretching experiences that fundamentally changes you forever.  I simply do not know what he has been through and he has been kind enough to not try and explain because it is ridiculous to try.  What I see is that he has become accustomed to the weight, like becoming comfortable walking 100 miles with a 75 pound pack. We see the growth and the stamina step up. It is especially cool because it was self-inflicted.  He has enormous drive and a high octane orientation towards achievement.  Incredible year of hard hitting success.  Very impressive..... I am in awe of his sense of adventure and enthusiasm to go on the unbeaten path. 
• 
  
  

  
  
  McKenna - Graduated in Nursing with great grades, completed her ROTC requirements, competed in a national Army Ranger challenge resulting in 5th place from 60 global teams and commissioned into the Army as 2nd Lieutenant.  I remember clearly how she wasn't sure if she would get into the Nursing program, and then how soon after she was already trying to push their performance standards up even higher.  She wanted to be more challenged than she was.  She eats challenge for breakfast.  What capped off the year so far was the life changing milestone of getting married to her good friend and confidant - Aaron Campbell.  The incredible helicopter ride up the mountains, the special landing spot and the very sweet and simple ceremony capped the occasion.  I am not even sure how to count all the mile markers she passed in the last year.  There is nothing more fun to watch the world of opportunity open up to her and watch her squeal and squirm wondering which ones to prioritize.  She will always be able to do so many things..... It will be so great to see her choose.

• 
  
  Braden - Graduated U of U Engineering School with high honors and on Dean's list.  He doesn't seem to really care about that.  He is uncharacteristically cool that way.  His super cute wife, Abby graduated from BYU Law school. Not only might he move on to get a masters, but he also took the LSAT and is contemplating law school which by his score, he could get into.  He got a great internship at Micron while Abby is about to pass the bar exam.  I have lost count of the scholarships he has received.  He conducted some major research with a professor that was super intense and practically crushing.  I know he had to learn to deal with a lot of stress, which is not his favorite thing.  Balancing multiple courses, a crazy heavy research project, church responsibilities and still making the right calls in spending time with Abby I am sure was not always easy. He was stretched in many ways that I probably won't ever know, but he came through making it look easy, as he has an incredibly annoying knack of doing with most things in his life.  They both have have set new personal bests this year...

• 
  Alexa - Not only did she get married to a great guy, Grant Gardner, but she also started a brand new career in the past year with the airline industry.  Delta.  She crushed all of her orientation and onboarding training, in fact, her supe said that she have never seen anyone learn as fast a Alexa. What makes this even better is that often she can work with her mom.  They see each other all the time, they swap shifts and tell the most outrageous stories and commiserate together.  Next to Landon, I am not sure I have seen anyone go after someone that treats herself or mom poorly.  She doesn't take anyone's nonsense (stuff) and has become a totally trusted agent.  Everyone comments on how great she is and how competent she has become.  Her smile melts Alaska and she has done an amazing job creating a career path for herself.  Way to go Alexa, you are shining big time!   Another milestone is surviving somehow living with mom and dad for extended periods of time.  She has taught us a lot about how to keep your life organized and tidy.  She has definitely attained the Domestic Goddess title.  If folding perfect clothes got you into Heaven, she would be translated immediately!!!   When she is not home we know that if we don't clean it she will get after us when she gets home.... It's crazy to feel that pressure! She has grown in so many ways it has been an amazing experience having her close by.  Big props to Alexa for her achievements and growth!  She is so quietly capable and I know there isn't a hurdle she can't leap over.

These are just a few....It is gratifying to see through my eyes.  I may not have gotten every hurdle perfectly correct, but I see what I see.  They say you should bring your kids up to surpass yourselves as parents.  They all came this way with so many of these qualities hardwired.  Maybe mix in a bit of parental influence and love and then just wind them up and let them run with their superpowers.

They are and will always be the Fantastic 4 super heroes in my book.  Keep learning the lessons of your experience and nothing will get in your way.....

“EVERYONE FAILS AT WHO THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE, THOR. THE MEASURE OF A PERSON, OF A HERO…IS HOW WELL THEY SUCCEED AT BEING WHO THEY ARE.”

 

- FRIGGA, AVENGERS: ENDGAME