2nd Lieutenant Brown

A few days ago I experienced another major milestone in one of my kids life.  My daughter, McKenna, received her commission into the army at the rank of 2nd Lieutenant.  It was an amazing experience for her and it left me and her Mom without proper words, hand over heart, breathless, and in awe.

I really didn't understand what commissioning really meant.  McKenna tried to explain it and so I thought I thought maybe it would be like a graduation ceremony.  It is one thing to understand what a commission is 'on paper' and altogether another thing to experience it for real, live, up close....

It is a powerful ceremony that transfers real power and authority from the U.S. Government to newly commissioned cadets as the newest officers in the Army.  The people of this nation have just symbolically raised their arms to the square to ratify McKenna as one that has shown the commitment to lead and command others in times of peace and conflict in defense of our liberty and freedom.

Hearing the responsibility and weight of the pledge she took was very serious.  This is a commitment to put oneself in harms way for her country.  It forced me to reflect and think about if I could ever do what she was doing.  As I waited for the ceremony to begin, I quickly threw that question out to the universe in my mind and the answer came back as, probably not.   That made me think deeper about what McKenna and the other cadets were made that would inspire them to overcome the natural resistance that many people might feel about joining the military.  While I believe I am a patriot, the idea of joining up is different.  I was so unprepared at that age and McKenna is totally prepared..... to be honest, I a not sure I am prepared now or ever would be....

She took the oath as seriously as you can imagine, no smiles, no laughter, repeating the words with resolute determination. This was McKenna at her finest, at her best, to serve God and country without hesitation.

Anyone who knows me it doesn't take much for me to get misty eyed.  Of course I felt the familiar feelings and emotions come to the surface, but it was much deeper in this case.  This was a profound feeling that had greater depth and magnitude.  Why?  Not just because any patriot would feel proud of t their son or daughter being commissioned, but because we know that if McKenna could have her wish, which God has shown a strong pattern of granting her, she would love to be deployed as a nurse anesthetist attached so a special forces unit.  Secretly she has always wanted to do infantry. They way she wants this epitomizes the saying when you want something so bad you can "taste it".  So, we are confronted with the vey real possibility of those implications which are both redeeming and alarming all at the same time.

The circumstances under which she received her commission were extraordinary..... yes, one might even say miraculous.  In fact, let me just come out and say that it was a miracle and that I know that God knows that I know.  It was a miracle wrought by belief, faith, courage, grit and a special kind of tenacity that McKenna has had the privilege of learning fairly early in her life.  She understands physical and mental adversity in a special way and has demonstrated great proficiency in overcoming both.

McKenna tore both ACL's within a couple of years of each other playing soccer for high school and college.  She knew the pain of injury, the physical battle of recuperation, the mental lessons of patience and the emotional journey of heartache and disappointment. 

She has been on her ROTC Ranger Team, which is an elite competitive team that competes regionally and nationally.  The team placed 17th last year at Sandhurst, the name of the annual competition held at West Point NY each year.  The team had been upping their game all year to place more favorably in the competition. 

If you want to witness good examples of people with tunnel vision come over to my house and watch any one of my kids or my wife. (Notice how it is not me....) They all have developed an exceptional ability to focus with precision on particular interests they have.  They all got this from their mother.  It is a gigantic understatement to say that McKenna had been hyper-focused on getting ready for Sandhurst and for commissioning, which came only a few day later.  There was little else to talk about or consider in her world.   With Sandhurst quickly approaching, only a couple of weeks away, she felt something pop in her knee while playing a soccer game and not even on the field, but as she was walking off.  She knew instantly that it was probably a meniscus tear or another torn ACL.  She somehow made it through the night and came home the next day.  It would be a gigantic understatement to say that the disappointment and heartbreak she was experiencing was off the charts.  She could barely walk and there was a lot of pain. The prospect meant not only would she not be able to compete with her Ranger team at Sandhurst, but she would not be able to commission either, which would postpone a number of her future plans.  This was truly devastating news....letting her team down, which had to have 2 girls on the team and the burden that would place on them.  They would have to find a replacement.  And then to think of not commissioning.... Ugh! It was too much.

A couple of week earlier we had listened to our Church leaders in a world-wide televised conference share counsel on how to navigate our lives, live with more faith and to align our choices with God.  Our leader, President Nelson gave some very specific counsel to all members that I felt was very inspiring.  He invited us to adopt 5 practices into our daily routines:

1. Get on the covenant path (Remember the promises you made at baptism and in the temple)

2. Discover the joy of daily repentance

3. Learn about God and how He works

4. Seek and expect miracles

5. End any conflict in your personal life

As we were consoling McKenna that morning considering the inevitable consequences I found myself already bracing myself for the hard journey ahead that she would have to take and how I would need to be strong and positive.  One of the special things about our church is that we believe that God has delegated his power to worthy men on earth called the priesthood.  The express purpose of this delegated authority is to serve others, not self.  This is often manifest in the blessing of the sick and afflicted by placing hands on their heads and uttering a special prayer to invite the healing powers of heaven to help the person being administered to.  The most important part of this process is that of faith.  The confidence and hope both parties have that through their faith, God actually does participate in the healing process.  In fact, it is mostly by faith that people are healed.  This is what Jesus taught and demonstrated many many times in his ministry and often asked the people if they believed that He could heal them.  He is the one that said "by your faith are you healed."

The topic came up of my giving her a blessing and we talked about President Nelson's recent talk where he shared the importance of our seeking and expecting miracles.  Never had those words become more powerful and alive than in that moment.  We talked about our own faith and we decided that we would apply the counsel from our Prophet and put our faith in God and seek and expect a miracle.  The words came flowing through my mind as I laid my hands on her head and I remember blessing her with the faith to seek and expect miracles.  I knew I would have to have the same level of confidence as well.

She immediately got MRI's and Dr's counsel.  Yes, there was a meniscus tear and it would need to be operated on. She continued to get additional opinions and within a day or two she had a breakthrough discussion with her old high school trainer.  Someone who had extensive knowledge in this particular area with professional athletes.  He heard everything and then proceeded to tell her how she could, with the right techniques and conditioning, make it through Sandhurst.  She couldn't believe it but somehow she knew this guy knew her situation even just over the phone.  It was like he could see the xray and knew exactly what she needed to do.  He literally walked through all these different scenarios of how she could compete despite this injury.  By the time the call was done, she was in a completely different mindset.  She know she wouldn't be able to do many of the events, but she would still have to ruck (army term for running for freakin' miles with heavy pack) on every event for two days.  

So, she had to tell her team.  She asked them to please consider the impact of her injury and then vote to see if they wanted to get someone else.  They all voted her "in".  They know McKenna, she would not give up even if she left her leg on the field and came home with only one.  She  then had to tell her  commanding officer that although she was hurt that she would be commissioning and he said that she would need to provide a Dr's letter stating that she could. Part of the miracle came next in somehow through a myriad of phone calls, working different angles and finally finding the right people,  she got a letter that confirmed that she was well enough to commission.  I don't even want to know how all that happened but it did.  

Suddenly, she could walk and then started jogging and within a day was rucking and working out with her team.  She wasn't 100% well and had a gimp and it hurt a ton, but she was heading for Sandhurst!

Just seeing what transpired in 2-3 days was miraculous... but it got better.....

We went to Sandhurst to support and cheer the team on.  There were about 60 other teams.  It was unbelievably agonizing as parents to watch her do movements with the team and to witness each event.  She couldn't compete in many of them but was always there providing leadership, support and the mental grit of not giving up despite the pain she was feeling.  At the end of day 1 they had to do an 8 mile ruck up hill after about 20 miles of events before hand.  Our faith wavered a bit to be honest... would she be able to make that last hardest movement?  We prayed constantly all day long.

She texted us at 11:30pm saying that she and team had made it!  We were overjoyed.  We only found out later what a crucible that was for her. To run for hours on that knee that was not supposed to be working at all and the agonizing pain she endured.  She finally shared with us that she had to scream and cry out loud during the ruck to just let go of the pent up emotions and pain she was feeling.  The team couldn't believe that she was able to finish that 8 miles.  Many of them said that is what kept them going, knowing that she would never ever give up until she physically couldn't do it.  The mental grit she exerted is something I will never know or understand.  I am not sure I want to. But I knew that God knew how important this was to her.  He sustained her and got her through the worst.

...The team was in 5th place... another small miracle.  They were the best ROTC unit competing with military academy's: West Point and AirForce's elite teams. Here is a great article BYU RANGER TEAM

We readied ourselves for Day 2.  We had been through our own ringer and knew that we would need to keep up our own energy to keep up with the team.  They competed incredibly well all day, McKenna was great! To see her do her thing in multiple events like shooting and medical situations was awesome.  They ended up in 5th.  The best placement BYU has ever had. They earned the respect of many other teams that day.  Somehow, some way McKenna persevered, she achieved her goal and the team prevailed.  Yes, I can say literally that we witnessed a miracle.  The feelings inside were particularly sacred.  I will not forget what I saw and felt during that weekend.  The feelings of seeing hundreds of young men and women dedicating their lives to our freedom.  To feel their great spirit when interacting with them.  They were entirely impressive.  It was an honor to walk West Point hallowed grounds and to see soldiers in action.  I was different by the time I left.  

The miracle had length to it.  It wasn't just the physical part that she needed for Sandhurst, rather it extended into her commissioning a few days later.  You saw the picture above.... Yes, she did it.  She had no doubt that this could be done and I hope more than anything that she will remember that huddle we had that morning when we decided to seek and expect miracles.  I hope that she will remember those words came from a living Prophet, that God is aware of the minute details of her life, of all our lives, that He will do many things we think are impossible if we are willing to take a few steps forward first, expecting the miracle will follow.

What if we all pledged, as she and many many other cadets did in their commissioning to live a good life, to love our neighbors as ourselves, to love God and to serve Him and others.  That was I felt inspired to do, to recommit to what I already know in my heart and mind is true but that I don't always honor through my actions and words.    

I am grateful for young people.  They are the future.  They are our hope.  They will be the miracle we need in this country  I believe to overcome the challenges we face.  I proudly salute you 2nd Lieutenant Brown, for your courage to live and honor the pledge you have taken and for seeking and expecting miracles. You have inspired me to do the same.