It Takes Time

It's true isn't it? 

Things take time....

I can thing of many experiences and events just in the past year that have brought me to this conclusion.  No matter how fast I want things to go or progress, many things in my life are just taking their own sweet time.....

After being frustrated at initial attempts to hurry things along, I find myself circling back around, over and over again to this truth, that although I have free will and can choose to direct my life, I am simply just not always in control of speed, sequence or acceleration.

Things at work, things with kids, things with friends, things with marriage all seem to setup in a way that is tempering my impatience, elongating my view, causing more humility and allowing me to take on new perspectives that I would not have appreciated had I been able to move at my own pace.

I really like the phrase:  "Slow your roll." It suggests more than just slow down... to me, it invites a more contemplative state, as if to be aware of what is going around you instead of just speeding down whatever life's "highway" you may be on.  

Is it possible that somethings are just meant to take time?

I have a number of friends that have become expert at the art and science of barbecuing/smoking meat.  The more I hear them talk and understand, the more the principle of patience and taking time applies and comes to life for me.  They talk about all the pre-work one must undertake with the right wood, the right rubs, the right spices and then always there is this long process of hours of marination....  by the time you actually get to eat your dinner, it has gone through like 24 hours of careful, painstaking preparation--but the results are amazing!  It is completely worth it they say.

So..... Things take time....

I think about the things we did as parents when the kids were young hoping they would learn early in their lives the importance of certain values and habits often feels hopeless because we expect results much sooner then they are able to digest and appreciate.  It is only years later, after much consistency over time might they come to realize those things you invested in with so much passion, emotion and hope might actually be recognized or appreciated.  When those small moments occur, they seem like huge wins inside!  Years of waiting can immediately disappear with one small  "Mom, thanks for helping me not make a horrible decision"  or the best one  "Mom, thanks!"

Once these little moments start, they seem to trickle in with a bit more consistency and flow.  Each one is like a precious gem.  It is amazing how few a parent actually needs to hear to feel validated for trying to do the right thing....when it seems so easy to second guess ourselves with the "could have, should have's" that never help or take us anywhere good.

I have received a couple of these recently.. man did they feel good!  they melted my heart and burned inside with a warm glow.  Maybe, just maybe I did a couple of things right.... I guess wondering will always be part of being a parent.  Maybe that is what keeps us on our toes, so we remember we are never done, no matter how old they are or even if they leave home.   I don't try as hard anymore, I try to listen more, ask a few more questions back, and then hold my tongue and bring to life this new phrase I am learning... 

Keep chill....and Slow your roll.....More often things tend to turn out better than over analyzing, over orchestrating, or thinking too hard.  (All of which I am pretty terrible at....)