Things we found in the Fire....

School ended for the kids a week or so ago.  They somehow seem to accumulate piles of paper in the form of homework, notebooks, tests, quizzes, syllabus', notes  throughout the year.

A year ago we started our first end of school bonfire in the backyard firepit.  This means burning all of those piles of paper.  The time had come for year No. 2.  We like to call it Family Home Evening with a twist:  The lesson, activity and treat are all wrapped into one.

1.  The Lesson:  Discussions of what transpired during the year.  Everyone talks about their highlights, lowlights and what they learned.  It usually involves talking about crazy teachers, horrible homework, ridiculous tests, friends, and awesome events.
2.  Activity:  Wadding and throwing of paper accurately into the fire.  (Super highly underrated activity btw)
3. Treat:  Wadding and throwing of paper accurately into the fire!!  :   ) ....... Actually, the treat is S'mores at the end!  

So, we gathered up all the years' schoolwork, sorted into 5 piles, one for each of us, found matches, lit the kindling and started wadding up every single paper into a ball and started throwing them into the fire.  There are seriously hundreds of pages.  One by one each is scanned, sometimes re-read and occasionally placed into an unexpected "save" pile.  It usually takes a couple of hours.  During the wadding and throwing we start reviewing the year.... we recount the highlights, re-tell the stories, hear new things that never made it to conversation until now....as if they just happened. 

 COMMERCIAL BREAK:  Parents- you want to get your kids talking?  Get a bonfire going where they can throw things into it and they will start talking about things you never would have heard otherwise......So fun!

After we get enough coals going, we put in the tinfoil dinners while we keep going.  I come across some little treasures in my pile of soon-to-be-burnt offerings.  They are short stories that McKenna wrote in English.  They are totally hilarious fairy tales full of cheesy romance with contrasting death and destruction sub-themes weaved in.  I read these out loud to the rest of the family causing everyone to end up belly laughing.  Those are keepers.....Then there are those precious gems I find......the little genius doodles that are drawn in the margins of Chemistry homework.  Little sketches long forgotten.....almost burned to death....saved by virtue of a ceremonial ritual.

I pause and check the tinfoil dinners as we hear their juices crackling and hissing inside.  They smell as good as if we were camping.  I throw the first one on a doubled-up paper plate and burn my fingers trying to open up the two layers of foil.  The steam pours out and the smell engulfs my nose....."Ahh!  I hope the potatoes and carrots aren't crunchy" I say to myself.  First bite of potato is perfect.....almost scalds.....Ok, enough of that.... you know what I am talking about.  I get them all ready and we dine like kings....

.....the fire has died down while we have eaten so now needs to be stoked again..... soon a steady stream of paper wads all find their way into the fire....one by one.....the orange flames grow longer and brighter......the aura of heat returns....I back my camp chair back a foot.....finally, the piles of paper are gone....the conversation quiets.....S'mores are finally eaten and then an unplanned transition occurs.....we all slowly fix our gaze on the fire......eyes transfixed--what an easy place to get lost in....

Fire is so metaphorical.  Most of the time the word conjures up feelings of panic and fear. We spend a lot of time preventing and putting out fires.  For good reason......However, the world actually needs fire.   It is a cyclical phenomenon that is important to Earth's environmental life cycle.  

 Fire burns down things so that new things can come up and grow. 

I began connecting what we were doing with that life cycle idea--We were closing out a school year in order to prepare for a new one.  We were purging.....ending things so new things could begin.  It was a cool revelation of how the moment of throwing something tangible became a process of "tossing' other non-paper "wads" of other things in our lives into the "fire" of life.  With each toss, something new was put in its place.... a new hope, a new horizon.  New dirt to seed thoughts ideas and actions.  New growth.......Our little experience became a spiritual experience.  We found the Spirit in the fire.

Some things we found in our fire:
1.  Fire can bring families together
2.  Kids get it when you provide the right environment for learning
3.  Ending things together on our own terms can feel incredibly satisfying
4.  There is spirituality in fire
5.  There is spiritual fire
6.  Spiritual fire can cleanse 
7.  We need Spiritual fire to live our lives in meaningful ways.
8.  There is a forever supply of new beginnings and growth from fire

There was another fire once.... long ago a man was asked to build a fire, and sacrifice something very dear to him in that fire:

 "And Isaac spake unto Abraham his father, and said, My father: and he said, Here am I, my son. And he said, Behold the fire and the wood: but where is the lamb for a burnt offering?"                                        ---Genesis 22:7

Maybe he knew, maybe he didn't, but either way Isaac was going to be that offering put into that fire.  God stayed Abraham's hand but he learned the greatest lesson that day because it was a mirror of what God would end up doing with His son Jesus Christ.  Abraham received a taste of what it would feel like for God to witness the sacrifice of His Son.  Abraham found a profound lesson in that particular fire....

The ultimate sacrifice, the ultimate fire, the ultimate hope and new horizon.

I wonder what we are going to find in next years fire.... ?  What will you find in yours?

Isaac spoke to Abraham his father and said, "My father!" And he said, "Here I am, my son." And he said, "Behold, the fire and the wood, but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?" - See more at: http://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Fire#sthash.fIRMgKq1.dpuf

Isaac spoke to Abraham his father and said, "My father!" And he said, "Here I am, my son." And he said, "Behold, the fire and the wood, but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?" - See more at: http://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Fire#sthash.fIRMgKq1.dpuf

Isaac spoke to Abraham his father and said, "My father!" And he said, "Here I am, my son." And he said, "Behold, the fire and the wood, but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?" - See more at: http://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Fire#sthash.fIRMgKq1.dpuf

O Jogo Bonito World Cup 2014

There is only one thing better than Brazilian soccer and that is Brazilian soccer during the World Cup.  More people watch the World Cup than the Olympics.

It is difficult for the average non-soccer follower to completely understand because the level of intense enthusiasm and expectation that Brazilians have is actually beyond that of any sport here in the US or, in my opinion, any other sport in the world.  It is an incredible feeling to be at just a normal club soccer game which I did once in Rio de Janeiro at Maracana stadium (100,000 cap.)  That was like an NBA finals experience.   So, I can't really wrap my head around what it will be like today or the rest of the tournament during the World cup games when Brazil plays.

Soccer is more like a religion in Brazil than any other country.  Banks close, stock markets respond to local club team wins and losses. Most people don't work on game days.  It is in their blood.  I remember back in '82 when Brazil lost someone wrapped themselves in a flag and jumped off a building....  yeah, intense.  I remember one Sunday at church our leader got up and said that he was cutting short our meetings so the congregation could go home and watch the game!


One Englishman summed it up best:

"Some people believe football is a matter of life and death. I'm very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that."

Bill Shankly - English soccer manager.

When they play at their best, it is something beautiful to behold....  Their style is unlike others.... totally fluid, creative and free flowing.... It would be like comparing free style Jazz to an orchestra playing classical music.  You have no idea what combinations are going to come out each time they come down the field, just like a saxophone solo.  So that is why it is so captivating to watch.

It is amazing that a simple love affair a young Brazilian boy has with a soccer ball can inspire an entire nation. Today one "boy" named Neymar scored twice to lift Brazil to the first win of the 2014 World Cup.  His country cheered in unison around him.

Call me a traitor but I have to go with Brazil during the World Cup.  Futebol, está no meu sangue....

Vai Ganhar o Jogo Bonito

"Hey Dad, I got some Art Supplies today!"

Girl 1

How many times have you bought little art supply kits for your kids over the years? Remember how cool they were to get as a kid — all those crayons and colored pencils lined up next to each other, paintbrushes, sometimes pastels (always more fun to look at than actually use). I remember my school supplies box — a small bottle of paste, popsicle sticks, bad scissors, crayons. Fun to organize at the start of the year, junk drawer by Friday. The masterpieces it produced? A handprint turkey. Popsicle sticks glued into a beautiful but completely dysfunctional fan.

So when McKenna told me she bought some art supplies — sure, why not. First week of summer, rehabbing a torn ACL, time to kill. I was expecting maybe some bunnies, kittens or little puppies that she is always squealing about.

Girl 1

I find her new sketchbook on the computer desk. I can never resist....(which she knows)....and so I open it and there is "Girl 1". I look and wonder — "Really? McKenna did this?"

Just then she walks in. I am like, "Woah, this is really nice!" She smiles and says "Thanks". I ask, "When did you do this?" "An hour or so ago" she says. I look at her again and she gets this cool smile as if she has been waiting for months for me to walk into this conversation..... oh yeah, she knows she just did something very good.

Girl 2

Girl 2

Fast forward two hours. I get home after doing some errands. I stop by the sketchbook again to see how Girl 1 is shaping up....Instead I see Girl 2. "What the...?" So I ask: "Where did this one come from?" She says casually: "I wanted to do another one..." I'm all: Really.....?

I take my time and soak in the details. The wispy hair strands, following the line of sight of her eyes makes me want to know what she is looking at, the forward hunchedness of her shoulders, the overall expression something like "reflective but aloof." It was fun to absorb this for a minute — and then connect the dots to what a fresh set of art supplies can actually unlock.

McKenna, I love your work. I thought I knew all your tricks. Apparently I didn't know this one. This is week one of an entire summer. There are a lot of blank pages left in that sketchbook — and after seeing what two hours and a fresh set of art supplies unlocked, I genuinely cannot wait to see what's in there by August 30.

Here's to art supplies. And to daughters who smile like they've been keeping a secret.

Finishing Positions... Closing the loop - From Ricky Seabra fan of Mom

This is my dear lifelong friend: Ricky Seabra.  I spent 4 years with him during my high school years in Brasilia, Brazil.   We have stayed friends ever since, over 30 years.......I chose this picture because it doesn't do him justice to just show him by himself.  It is entirely more appropriate to show him with art.  He is a professional artist and it would take a book to explain all that he has done and has been involved with.  Simply one of the most creative people I have ever known and undoubtedly one of the greatest humans on the earth that I have had the incredible good fortune to associate with and to confidently call a "friend". 

He appreciated my mother like few others did, especially as a teenager.  Mom taught us both dance.  We performed two dances: a Charleston and a Tap dance during a 4th of July celebration at the Ambassador's residence in Brasilia when we were 15/16 years old.  We had a blast.  Ricky not only had creative genes flowing in his blood but his Emotional Intelligence quotient is off the charts.  He is exquisitely sensitive to other people. 

A couple of years ago I wrote a very personal blog post about my Mother, called "Finishing Positions" upon finding photos of her that I had never seen.  It captures my reflection of the life lessons she taught me through dance.  Ricky was so kind to reply after reading it that I felt I needed to share his response with a post of his own.  What he shared is a reflection of the type of friends I have had in my life.... extraordinary people that love and feel deeply about other people, life and what are journey really is all about.  Obrigado meu grande amigo. Your words means so much to me.......

"Aaron, I want to comment on that picture of your Mom in your blog - how deeply it (along with your story) resounded in me.

Since the advent of YouTube I started to create folders in my YouTube account saving my favorite videos in various folders with names like: sesame street, politics, airplanes, bloopers, letterman episodes, commercials, most beautiful songs, great performances, etc. There are approximately 60 folders. One of these folders I called “Hawaii”.

I have a love for Hawaiian dance and music. And upon seeing that picture of your Mom I remember why I have this passion for Hawaii. You... your Mom and maybe even Cheryl (is that your sister’s name?) introduced me to Hawaiian dance for the first time. I remember you showed me some steps once. I believe it was in a garage at SQS113. You started doing the moves, arms held out sideways and fingers rubbing on thumbs. You told me your Mom knew it and had taught you some. It was very sensual. But I don’t think I thought in terms of sensuality back then. The grace is what blew me away. The fact that your Mom had taught this incredibly graceful dance to you blew me away as well.

I think I asked your Mom to show me some Hawaiian dance. I remember the garage again. I also have a recollection of your Mom doing a step for me in your living room. Maybe even with your sister. Now for some reason I am seeing J.J. and even Roland (you have a brother named Roland don’t you?) doing a Hawaiian move. I wouldn’t be surprised if I was so fascinated by it that I asked each and every Brown to show me what they knew of Hawaiian dance. (To me you were a family of artists and I knew it was because of your Mom.)

I loved reading about you describing your mother’s method – her speaking of the "details" of dance, the "following through", her "finishing", her need to convey the importance of “ending well”... this is what the true artist comes to Earth to do... to cause awe, enchantment and to give people revelation. All those only come with ending well. If I had known then what I know now I would have picked her brain a lot. All I can do now is make the same subtle readjustments (to my artistic life) she would have demanded of her students. “No... Elbow here. Fingers like this...” I listen to her and I make adjustments to my “following throughs”.

At three different festivals I have shown my favorite YouTubes to audiences in an event I call “Me Tarzan You Tube”. Among the videos I show are Hawaiian dance videos.

Last year I met a dancer in Teresina, Piauí whom I have grown to admire as an artist. And there are certain videos, certain gems that I find on YouTube that I only share with him, because I trust he will cherish them and do something brilliant with them. I showed him some of my Hawaiian videos once. One was of a Hawaiian mother and daughter dancing in their den at home.

And I want to share this one with you... and you’ll understand why. Something wonderfully full circle has taken place here. You know that children’s telephone game that kids or teenagers play at sleepovers or parties? Someone whispers a phrase into another person’s ear and that person has to repeat it to the next who has to repeat to the next and the next? You can only say the phrase once. The phrase becomes altered as it travels from ear to ear. Finally the last person has to say it out loud and the resulting phrase is usually a hysterical corruption of the original.

Well, your Mom initiated this game which has taken decades to play by whispering hula to you, you to me, me to Elielson. Only this time the message did not come out corrupted in the end... the message in the end is a reaffirmation of what an impactful, caring, generous and dedicated artist your mother was.

Um graaaaaande beijo no seu coração."

Check out video: http://vimeo.com/18977641

Big Hair Band Ballads that got me through the 80's

*Please turn off Playlist player below to listen to links

1984:  Alone Again 
(So.....deep, so......complex,  oh so over my head  :   )

1986:   Nobody's Fool  
 (Totally creepy voice that I love)

1987:   Hysteria 
("Hysteria when you're near"....oh yeah they can rhyme real guud)

1988:   Every Rose has it's Thorn 
(as Classic as a big-hair-band-ballad can get)

1988:   When the Children Cry 
 (It's hard to keep back the tears even now)





 


1989:  When I am With You  
(Canadians can have big hair too!)








          1990: More than words Can Say by Alias   (*Power ballad kept from being #1 due to some silly Mariah Carey song....hah)

   1990:  See You in My Dreams by Giant (Awesome power and needed about 3 more key changes than the 4 it already had)

   1990:  Send Me an Angel  (German Metal guys have sensitive hearts)  
*Awesome live performance

  1991:   Love of a Lifetime by Firehouse  (My all time favorite!)

Down's Syndrome Tiger

I am way overdue on sharing some of McKenna's most recent artwork.  I think my last post was about 4 years ago or so and it was displaying her work when she was about 9 or 10 years old.  This is her latest piece.  Her teacher liked it so much he displayed it in the halls of the High School.  It was a nice moment of validation and recognition for her.

A couple of days ago she overheard a couple of boys looking at it say "Oh look, a Down's-syndrome tiger!"  

She laughed big time....  The little guy does have some slanty eyes because of Mom's enormous tongue, not because of any birth defects.

So, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder"  Plato says....True, so true.  It is amazing to me that people can look at seemingly the same thing and yet draw such completely different conclusions. This is across the board.  Although there do seem to be some standards that most do agree with respect to things of quality and beauty there is still never ending room for opinion and individual insight.

I remember thinking a lot about why cool things seemed cool.  Why someone was pretty or not so pretty and why we would even differentiate between such things.  Why does a high end car like a Mercedez actually look "high end" compared to another car.  They are both made of metal, rubber, plastic and painted parts.  Yet the distinction is enormous even beyond that of price to most....not everyone. 

Confucius says:  "Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it."

and we can't forget the very important corollary statement from Miss Piggy:

"Beauty is in the eye of he beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."

I have found myself seeing things that others do not see and I find that beautiful... the discovery of something just underneath....sometimes the inspired moment of application is the most beautiful thing...not the scripture or words, but the insight that comes as a result of viewing something.  Other times it most definitely is the pure face value of the thing.  A fiery colorful sunset, an impossible goal scored, a smile or a pair of ocean green eyes....

When I look at something my daughter drew, like the "Down's syndrome" tiger above... Do I naturally see more beauty than really is there because I am her Dad and the fact that she drew something like this makes me bust out in pride?  Or is it beautiful despite the fact that she has my DNA?  You know... it doesn't matter.  You see what you want to see.... that is cool.... I know what I see.  I love that about art.  The artist usually is the most generous about what there is to see.  Often they don't even know.  They just knew that they had to create, paint or sculpt the thing.  I think they secretly love to know that there are a million different feelings and views.  The ultimate flattery.... and then maybe that is where the ultimate beauty lies.... in the sharing of it.  The gift of it, the talent that created it to be placed on the altar of life for all to see and partake of....

Thank God for the Artists and the part they play.... you have come a long way McKenna from your computer generated MS Paint images of the past.  They both are beautiful to this beholder. I see a Mom who loves her cub drawn perfectly by someone who loves animals so much....

                                              ....even if she does have Down's syndrome...!

Warrior Princess

This is one of my favorite pics of McKenna ever.   I think she was about 8.  I saw her there and it was one of the burst-of-energy flashes where I just had to take her picture, no matter what!  She really didn't want to pose, so I just asked her to turn slightly.  She did, and then gave that incredible look.  The one that melted my heart.  Not mischievious, although it looks that way, more like.......yes, Coy.  Confidently bashful

When she was about 8 weeks old I gave her a special priesthood blessing as we are accustomed to doing in our Church.  It isn't a baptism, rather more of a "name giving" ordinance.  We typically give infants their official name and then say things that come to mind that we feel inspired to say that might be helpful for them to learn about themselves later.  It is a special kind of prayer that only happens once this way.  I have been able to do this for all 4 kids and they have become very special moments for me.   Since we do record and document these prayers, the kids can actually see and read what was said to them when they were babies.  It has been really interesting to see how they process what they read as they get older.  It is fascinating to see if some of the things that were said so many years ago have actually realized yet or not in their lives.

For example,  I remember distinctly one particular part of what I said in McKenna's prayer that left a powerful impression upon me.  I blessed her that she would be able to withstand the powerful temptations of life and be a "warrior against the adversary" if she stayed obedient and close to her Heavenly Father throughout her life.  I am not sure why the word "warrior" was the one that I felt inspired to say, but I did as I felt it was given to me by the Spirit.  I remember  thinking that I would have to really pay attention to this metaphor as she grew up to see how this particular promise would play out in her life.  

It has been a pleasure to see how she has developed over the years into someone that so clearly knows right from wrong.  She makes decisions daily that reinforce this principle.   She chooses to be positive almost always.  She chooses friends carefully and has the ability to see people in their best possible light.  She has enormous empathy that seems beyond her years. I have been so pleased to say that she has done an incredible job not only just enduring trials but passing through them with a lot of grace and beauty.  She isn't a whiner, never has been.  She is quietly determined and has a very deep spirituality that guides her life like a sound and sure rudder. 

This past week a new challenge entered her life.  She was playing soccer, as she always has, and went up for a ball, got bumped and then came down not quite right on her left leg and heard a "pop".  She went down with incredible pain and she knew something was wrong.  We hurried her to the Dr and shortly was diagnosed with a completely torn ACL and bruised MCL.  This is not an uncommon injury for an athlete playing at this competitive level.  What this represents is really more about timing than anything.  She was inviting college coaches to watch her play.  She was two weeks away from the Club Annual State Cup.  She had been visiting colleges as well.  To add insult to injury, she is now in jeapordy of not being able to come back in time for her Senior year of High School soccer which she has played since a freshman.  All of these plans, dreams and expectations deteriorated in just a few seconds and minutes.  Oh yeah... and prom was Friday on top of that.

The night she was hurt I was able to give her another kind of special priesthood blessing.  A healing blessing that invited the windows of Heaven to open and to invite a special healing power to come into McKenna's life and to help prepare her for the surgery, (Tomorrow) and for the very tough physical therapy to come afterwards.  Once again words came that were not my own...  Words that said to her that she would be blessed with the ability to not only heal from this injury but that there were some powerful lessons that the Lord wants her to learn during this time that will prepare her for other things that will come in her life.  That her well of empathy might be deepened and her ability to serve others could be magnified as a result of this injury/process.  I invited her to be sensitive to listening to the Spirit so that she would recognize these lessons and guard them close now, only to then use them in abundance later.

I prepare myself for new chapter of monitoring and paying attention to what transpires the next 4 - 6 months.... to watch and absorb how she applies herself to this process and what she ends up learning along the way.  Then, later.....much later, I see myself looking back on this experience and helping her see how well she applied these lessons by blessing many peoples lives through her love and empathy.  She will finally come to understand that the Lord often achieves His purposes through mysterious ways.  Using adversity is just one way.... but it is a marvelous way when viewed with proper perspective.  Gibran always sheds such great perspective on life:

On Pain

      And a woman spoke, saying, "Tell us of Pain."
      And he said:
      Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
      Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain.
      And could you keep your heart in wonder at the daily miracles of your life, your pain would not seem less wondrous than your joy;
      And you would accept the seasons of your heart, even as you have always accepted the seasons that pass over your fields.
      And you would watch with serenity through the winters of your grief.
      Much of your pain is self-chosen.
      It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self.
      Therefore trust the physician, and drink his remedy in silence and tranquillity:
      For his hand, though heavy and hard, is guided by the tender hand of the Unseen,
      And the cup he brings, though it burn your lips, has been fashioned of the clay which the Potter has moistened with His own sacred tears. 


You are a Warrior McKenna, you were before you ever came here, and you most certainly are now.  There isn't a mountain you cannot climb, a storm you cannot weather, a battle that will ever best your indomitable spirit and unconquerable faith.   You will cry many tears of physical and emotional pain of what "could have been" but you will never realize just how many people you will inspire along the way.  Watching you wage quiet and subtle war on those forces that would thwart God's ways is a beautiful thing.....

                                                                          This too shall pass.....

Tribute to Senna - 20 years later

I became a fan of Formula 1 racing when I lived in Brazil.  I have absolutely no idea why, but every Sunday morning I remember watching F1 races on TV and became a fan of Nelson Piquet first as he was a World Champion 3 times.  Other Brazilians surfaced and I began to follow them even after I left Brazil.  One in particular that seemed to captivate the entire racing scene and country was Aryton Senna.  He was unlike any other, completely mesmerizing and unusually gifted and is still renowned today 20 years later as the greatest F1 driver ever.  He is still the reference by which others measure to.

Today marks the 20th anniversary of his death at Imola, the raceway of the Italian Grand Prix in 1994. Since then a bronze statue was placed there as a memorial to all his fans.  It captures his enigmatic aspect really well.  Rather than a victorious "Rocky Balboa" image, it show him sitting as if on the pit wall in his racing overalls with his head bowed, as if lost in thought.  This was the introspective Senna.

When he died it was an astronomical loss for Brazilians.  He had captivated his country and fans all over.  Not unlike Elvis, many people will remember that day, where they were, what they were doing, what time of day it was.  His funeral was enormous:  A million people attended and there was 3 days of official state mourning.  He was Brazil's hero.  Probably the closest thing to Pele that Brazil has yet produced.

Even the national soccer team, the single most important export the world knows Brazil for paid respects.  The same year he died, a few months later Brazil won their 4th unprecedented World Cup and dedicated the win to Senna.

I found him extremely fascinating beyond that of just being Brazilian.  I have spent many hours studying him both on and off the track.  He believed in God and often talked about Him as part of his driving.  He was generous to those who had less than he did.  He was competitive beyond belief but was so human, accessible and charismatic.  In one race he stopped when he saw another car crash and spinout onto the track and risked his life to get the driver out and actually saved his life. Senna saves Eric Comas (Video) He simply had achieved a level where he did things that no one else could. He was a game changer.

I will always remember the Yellow Helmet he is so well known for.  He wore it his entire career.  In my own way I join in with many others this day to remember him for what he was able to accomplish and the level of perfection he so desperately sought after his entire life.  He is very inspiring and left a deep and lasting impression with so many.